What did your mother say that made your jaw drop?

“Mum why is my sister such a bitch!”

About 30 years back, I was speaking with my mother.

She said, “Oh no I can’t give you our tickets, if we can’t go, well we don’t go - it is just not done to give away final tickets.”

Why is every human messed up in some way?

Well son “ I think I might have got you some tickets”

So I said to my sister “ You mean to say that that you leave two empty seats rather than give them to your brother” I replied in astonishment. - “Well yes thats how it works in our circle!” responded my sister.

What do you mean son?

What is a good habit and what is bad one?

Do you know what she said mum?

What! how could you do that?

Well I slept with the president of the Lawn tennis Association year ago, I think he may have remembered!!

Have anyone had an relationship of any kind with a spirit or demon, such as a succubus? If so, how was it?

My mother said to me “ Why didn’t you speak to me about this before”

“Oh come off it mum what would be the point?”

Oh I said, can my wife have them she would give her right arm to see a Wimbledon tennis final?

I’m a man. Why do I always fantasize about men’s cock? I don’t want a relationship with the man, I just want to suck his cock.

What on earth has brought this on, said my mother?

Well the other day she came into my shop asking for the usual discount and mentioned that she had tickets for the wimbledon Tennis final but couldn’t go.

True - how I loved my mum!

Why do certain religions consider menstruating women to be impure? Where did the concept of impurity stem from?

Well she is so snotty, O.K. she may have married a bit of money, I don’t know but she feels she is above everybody else.